Tag: Life

Hard love 

Hard love 

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2:00am They just left… Some people got cussed out by me today. Some people don’t understand when someone talks to them  softly and I don’t know how to do that when people keep doing the same shit over and over and are expecting different results. 

I’m not the most knowledgable person, but I have been through some shit, so I don’t take what I tell you lightly. I want the best for these  people, so I won’t tell them to do anything out the way, just do better! One or 2 steps at a time. Quit doing dumb shit and better things will come!

I don’t feel bad for going off like I did because when you bring bull shit to my house, you should expect to be cussed out in love. Thank you and goodnight. –RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

I still have issues

I still have issues

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I just watched Tony Robbins Nextflix special and realized one of my problems. I’ve never been acknowledged for anything by my family and it gets kinda old fast. 

It started a long time ago and it hasn’t stopped. I’ve looked for recognition from people all around me and it hasn’t been that easy to get. I can’t believe I’m still having issues. 

I think about all I’ve done for people and family and it just hurts for no one to care. They expect it because I’m the older sister, oldest child, the responsible one, the one that will help, the strong one, the one who will figure it out, the one that tries to keep the peace… The pushover. That shit sucks.  But I realized something today. I have to be the best me for me, and in that, I’ll be able to help others. Help isn’t always handouts and pep talks. Sometimes it’s doing and saying nothing at all… RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

Up and Left

Up and Left

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You have anyone you cared about just up and leave? Their reasoning doesn’t make since, you can’t help them change their mind because they don’t want to hear anything against their decision. You just want to know why. You just want to tell them that they mean a lot and you wish they wouldn’t go. When they leave, you’re mad at them because you wish they would come back. I don’t know what else to say… #lost

–RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

7 Days and Counting

7 Days and Counting

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Well yesterday I didn’t do any cleaning, but since last Thursday my husband and I have been cleaning out the house. It’s amazing how much shit you can collect over the years. 

Because of some of my life’s happenings I thought it was only right to take any and everything someone offers you. *sigh. I was wrong. It’s ok to say “No Thank you”. I also thought it was right to keep things that most people consider trash so I can transform it into art. WRONG AGAIN! Why do we feel like we have to carry EVERYTHING into the future? Most of it we don’t even like! That’s the same thing we do with our minds which is why we can’t move forward!!

Lesson for the day…. Get rid of some shit! -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

Beyoncé

Beyoncé

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 Who wants to be exposed like Beyoncé?

  •  She’s dealt with a lot of things the average person doesn’t deal with, so stop judging people you think you know, but know nothing about. 
  • From what I see, she’s caring, inspiring, motivating, imaginative, creative, she makes things happen and does things knowing the consequences 
  • She’s accused of all types of craziness, and has to deal with it

I feel like that’s the direction I’m headed. I don’t want to be famous, that’s not a desire at all, but I guess that may come with the territory. People take pride in being negative. If it comes, I have to deal with it too. 

  • I want the world to see my work. Why? Because I think it can heal people bringing them inspiration, happiness, hope and big dreams and just make people feel Good!!

-Reality Of A Preacher’s Daughter

Who am i

Who am i

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I’m an artist, designer, innovator, skin enthusiast, chemist, songwriter, singer, poet, dancer, writer and proud to be married black woman with natural hair and accessories. It’s never been easy to be who I am, so I’ve kept myself hidden, on lock down to stay safe. Stay protected from the elements. Why hasn’t it been easy? You will read about that in the book…

Reality of a Preacher’s Daughter


One Year Anniversary. I think I’m getting better

One Year Anniversary. I think I’m getting better

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I started this blog one year ago to change my life. I never intended for this to be an ongoing thing, it just happened. Probably because I can finally get my point across uninterrupted. 

I despise telling someone something and they keep cutting me off. Shut up! I have something amazing to say lol. 

Now I use WordPress for conversation since I don’t really go out or have a lot of friends to talk to. That’s how the psychos get started right? Hahaha

This blog has been my way out. My way to vent what I really want to say, how I really feel. I don’t care who’s looking because you don’t know who I am… Unless I’ve told you. 

It’s not like I’m important anyway. News reporters aren’t trying to find the secret identity of this chick who writes music/poetry, has a small business, and is an artist who’s telling her life in a very emotional way.  Who cares.

I just like to get out my feelings. After spending my entire life “keeping my mouth shut” I finally have a voice. I don’t have to keep stuff in and have it fester into sickness and hate and suicidal thoughts. I can get this shit out right here on this Blog and I’m very grateful!! 

-RealityOfAPreachersDaughter 

Flash Back Friday

Flash Back Friday

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I remembered today that I’m blessed. This time in 2001 I was in California experiencing slave labor from my uncle. 

  • Worked 7 days per week
  • Dresses only
  • Using me to bring in customers 
  • Had to be in his church every service
  • Had snitches to tell on you if you did something he wouldn’t approve of, so they could get in good with him
  • Told me my nose ring was demonic
  • Cussed me out and tried to fight me in front of his church in Downtown San Diego

#RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

Mistake? This blog?

Mistake? This blog?

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Yesterday I was reminded what my potential is. My life isn’t what I see, because this isn’t what I want and isn’t what I’m working for. I’ve been scared to finish the book and post my music because what people will think… But out of the 300 friends that I have on Facebook. 30 people probably actually read the posts and 2-8 people “like” it.  So why should I care. It’s a mistake to care so much about what People think. It holds us back from our true selves. The person who can really make a difference.  

Make mistakes. At least you’re trying. If it’s a mistake for me to be a business owner, preacher’s daughter, artist, older sister, wife and spill my life like this… I guess it is what it is. I will be successful anyway. 

My work is my life. My skincare line is my life. My art is my life. Writing is my life. These things balance me because I can be creative in different ways and I will use what I have to achieve the level of success I’m reaching for. Made a mistake and told someone what I’m striving for and they shot it all down. That’s why I keep my thoughts to myself. No one lives in my shoes and can do what I can because we are all different with different goals.  

 

Suicidal?

Suicidal?

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Suicide. It’s something I’ve thought about in the past. No one knew. I keep a smile. I stay strong for everyone. I let everyone see the strong girl who’s been though hell. I’ve kept what I’ve been though to myself. Why should I say anything? Who cares? I see how the world works. I see how there are more takers than givers. People act like they are slow sometimes and purposely overlook the obvious.

Sitting here asking God to please help me not to cry.

Am I this horrible of a person? Why don’t I get any support? Does anyone think about me? Does my mom think about me? Does my dad?  Yeah Right

Too late… Crying at work..

It can only get better right?