Sometimes Often

Sometimes Often

Sometimes often I feel like the entire universe is on my shoulders and I’m carrying it but it hurts and I’m tired

Sometimes often I feel like the dreams I’m running after are right in front of me. They’re almost in reach yet when I speed up to grab it, my dreams speed up to make me run harder 😩

Sometimes often I feel alone. I feel like few people understand me, yet many are inspired by my journey… how does that work?

Sometimes often I feel like the most creative person in the world, yet don’t know how THEE FUCK to show more than the 1400 people who follow me on all my IG accounts.

Sometimes often I feel so at peace because God constantly sends signs and I’m seeing them. They bring me comfort and joy. They make me feel like God sees and knows and hears and he wants me to succeed more than I do.

Sometimes often I feel like I’ve been building this empire for 20 years and just now finishing the framework. I’m ready to move in though! I’ve had this vision for so long. I’ve been the architect, project manager, builder, interior designer, landscaper, EVERYTHING! What is it that I need to do to finally move in??? I can upgrade later damnit! I’m ready

Constant thought

Constant thought

I’m always thinking. And that’s not always good cuz I allow my thoughts to collide with fear… then overthinking and worry happens.

At that moment… that very damn moment… The moment of worry, snap your mind out of it and into subjection of your true desires. What you really want in life. DO NOT THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU DO NOT WANT. Focus on your desires and your happiness.

Let go of everything and everyone who brings disharmony to your well being. They aren’t meant to be there. So it’s ok to let go. Throw them got damn shoes away that you just have because of how they use to look on you. That person who talks shit to you all the time and just wants to use you… walk THEEEEE FUCK AWAY IMMEDIATELY. No time to play games with fake ass, mediocre, sometimey, fickle people. –RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

Been fuckin Silent

Been fuckin Silent

I been fuckin silent

I been fuckin patient

I been fuckin cooperative

And I neglected my own interest

But I shall no longer be fuckin silent

I shall no longer be fuckin patient

I shall no longer be fuckin cooperative

I shall look out for my own interest and be the fuckin beast I know I was born to be.

Fuck the Bullshit- RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

Figure shit out

Figure shit out

If you’ve been reading my blog, a lot has happened over the years. I’ve had an interesting life as do many people. What separates me from most is that I’ve been through so much shit, that I’m determined to change my life. I’ve made adjustments gradually, but I’ve been more focused on people feelings than what I really needed. That’s the first problem.

When you focus on what everyone else needs versus your own, what do you think will happen? You think you’ll be happy? You think you’ll accomplish your goals? Well unless you trying to be someone’s crutch or burden for the rest of your life, you need to focus on yourself. One step at a time at first, but Figure the shit out! -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

Move Your Ass. Motivation. Monday.

Move Your Ass. Motivation. Monday.

Win. Ok, just fuckin win. Stop Overthinking, overanalyzing, tryin to be perfect… and all that shit. You just need to do what the fuck is necessary to win. It may not always be easy. You may seem like you’re not always putting your “best” out there, but just get it out.

I’ve hidden my talents and personality for years. For fuckin what?!?!?! So people wouldn’t criticize? People will talk shit regardless. I have family that hate me for absolutely no damn reason. People will always be evil. People will always judge, so you mine as well gone head and be yourself. Let the real you out and whoever drops off, let them folk GO GOT DAMNIT!!! Don’t give it Energy! Keep moving your ass!! -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

With tears rolling down my face I write this

With tears rolling down my face I write this

With tears rolling down my face I write this. I hate feeling like this. I felt like this for so long and suppressed it all. Now it resurfaces. When things are taking a turn.

Really I stay positive. Im happy that I’m free. But there’s still that part of me that wants love. Love without all the bullshit. Love of someone not just because they think I’m pretty, but someone in love with me.

I want to point blame, I want to just cry it out. But I’m trying to stay positive. This is my last day in Texas, been here for 3 weeks and I’m ready to go, but hesitant. Just not sure how life will play out and that can be hard.

The only thing I can do is claim true love and happiness and greatness and money. -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

Bout time to return

Bout time to return

My time in Texas is coming to an end. I have Monday and Tuesday left. It’s been a good eye opening trip. Been here since Dec. 18th.

I got a chance to get outside of my normal routine to change it up. See my life from a different perspective. I’ve grown in these three weeks. I’ve read and absorbed and rejected unnecessary things. I’m better and stronger than I was when I first got here. I know what I want and I’m gonna get it. –RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

Do it again

Do it again

Can I get a got damn do over for the beginning of 2019?

It rolled in with my mom feeling some type of way… my sister feeling some type of way, me in the middle, making me feel some type of way. Watching my mom limp around doesn’t fuckin help.

I’m always thinking about everyone else. When I finally think about myself, no one’s use to it, and I’m being selfish or bossy.

I’m not gonna deal with this shit this year. -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter

Awakened Beast 2019

Awakened Beast 2019

I never thought this would be my life, but I’m embracing it. All of it. All the decisions I’ve made that have helped me grow. I shouldn’t regret anything because it’s created this beast of a woman. This Wonder Super woman that’s about to finally reveal her super powers. This flower that bloomed last but is most beautiful most lovely scented.

I am great. I know I am. And showing myself can help inspire others. I have a damn story to tell, And you probably need to hear it -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter