Author: Preacher's Daughter
I'm a preacher's daughter trying to let go of my past so I can move on to be great! Every time I get going in life and business I come to a halt. I have to let this out to be free and possibly help others find their freedom.
I'm not doing this to give my dad or anyone else a bad name, so I don't mention any names. Not even my own. I hope you find my unfiltered life useful in someway.
Artist
I’ve been an undercover artist for 20+ years.
Don’t Misunderstand my Grind
Everyday is about work. I feel bad when I watch tv because I know I can be hustling in some way. At times I wish things were a lot easier because I feel like I’ve struggled all my life. I guess this is just making a better story.
When I look at my life, right now, I feel like I’ve had more downs than ups. Not feeling sorry for myself, I’m good, I’ve had to adjust and make shit work. People have NO idea, not a clue what I’ve gone through. It makes it worst being a preachers daughter, hustling for EVERYTHING I’ve ever gotten. #Truth
I’ve been researching and teaching myself how to be a business person, create brands, understanding what customers want and be authentic to who I am and what I stand for. So blogging is the ultimate way to get my feelings out instead of holding them in.
Mentors have taught me a lot over the past couple years and helped me realize a lot about myself. (These mentors have never met me, they don’t even know I exist, but they’ve helped me to get where I am) I’ve learned that hustling is more than doing something in secret for 50 years. Let me explain. My way outside of abuse was creating. I made many different types of artwork, danced, wrote, designed houses, created new hairstyles regularly… Whatever I could do to create something with what I had, and I didn’t have much. I kept it all in my room. I didn’t even hang art in my house when I was younger. My mom probably never even saw most of the work I did. Why? Why did I keep a large stack of drawings and paintings under my bed? Why was their pottery and sculptures on my floor?
Unfortunately, they are all gone now. You will read about that in my book.
But my hustle, my grind, is for people to know who I am and what I have to offer, because it’s better than good. I can’t worry about the lost art, I have to push forward. If people see me push past all the shit I’ve been through… Maybe that will encourage someone else. My decisions haven’t always been the best, and I don’t want people to judge my businesses off of that. You have to see the overall picture of what I stand for.
I stand for GREATNESS. Working until you achieve what you want. Hustle. Get your work seen. Be true to who you are no matter what people say or think. There will always be someone who doesn’t like you. Who cares!!! There may be 1,000 more piece whose lives you changed.
So the people who know me have seen me change my pace. I’m not going to wait to get seen and pray some celebrity posts a pic of my art or skincare on Instagram. I’m going to hustle my ass off to prove to myself that I can do it and help show the world that you can’t wait for anything Drop out the sky.
Remember, the richest place is and will always be the graveyard. Don’t add your contribution. -Reality Of A Preacher’s Daughter
I am NOT a Christian.
Ironically, I’m writing this on a Sunday. In the modern day “Christian” religion, it’s known as the Sabbath.
When you’re a Christian, you’re suppose to remember to always choose the Bible first. Reading other books related to Christian history and other religious books can damage your views of “Christ” and the bible. Well at least that’s how I was taught.
When I was a little girl, I remember saying “I’m not a Christian”. I never wanted to be. I watched “Christians” struggle, judge, lose themselves, hide, manipulate, hate, distort truth and consider themselves an untouchable being.
That’s not even all… Why in the world would anyone want to be like that? I recognized that as a little girl and decided I didn’t want to be “religious” or labeled to be anything other than myself. Now I recognize that even more. I’ve allowed myself to go a little deeper in the history of Christianity and learn history of Africa. Now I’m wondering what’s going on? Things aren’t adding up. I haven’t devoted enough time researching to talk about what I’ve learned so far, but to anyone with an open mind, you’d be wondering about “Christianity” too.
As a “Preacher’s Daughter”, and growing up with strict teachings, people will say all types of things about the person I’ve become.
“She’s a backslider” -What does that mean??
“She’s prodigal”
“She’s running from her call”
“Blasphemer”
If my mom knew what I thought, she would be horrified and probably go on a fast for my soul.
My dad would probably say since I don’t talk to him anymore I’ve turned my heart from God. There’s a word for that he’s use before and I can’t think of it. I remember! He would say I have a “reprobate mind.”
Bottom line, I hate religion. It’s because of how I was raised, but you will read about that in my book.
Happy Sunday!!
Success is up to me
Success means more to me than it means to other people. People don’t take advantage of the possibilities. I never did, because I never really knew what possibilities were around me.
I see people wasting time and energy all the time on insignifant shit and wondering why they are in the situation they’re in. Well, I’m one of those people making excuses, wasting time and wondering what I’m doing wrong.
When I’m trying to have fun, I can’t. I’m too worried about making money for bills to be paid.
I’ve been an artist for over 20 years and haven’t pushed my art to the public, so in the past few weeks, I’m putting my work out and wondering why people aren’t making it go viral. LMAO. I’m tripping myself out with what I’m expecting.
How the hell am I going to blow up and I just posted my art work yesterday? Then I think, but I’ve been an artist for over 20 years. Then I remember, I’ve hid it because I didn’t think it was good enough to share and 2 because I didn’t want anyone to steal my work. When you read my book, you will understand.
But my skincare, why isn’t that flying off the shelves? I started at the local farmers market in 2011 and it was slow at first, then took off the next couple years. Things changed at the market and I didn’t stay the entire last year. So why am I expecting all my customers for 6 years to follow me if they don’t know where I went.
My success is completely up to me and my actions. I need to get out of my feelings and do like Eric Thomas says “grind everyday” because what I’m doing just isn’t cutting it.
Working on the book…
Nothing about writing my life is easy. It’s been complicated for as long as I can remember.
Last year I decided to take charge of my life. I couldn’t take the constant struggle of dealing with family EVERYDAY. I have enough to deal with by myself, I don’t need added frustration.
Before you can help someone else, YOU HAVE TO HELP YOURSELF. It’s not selfish, it’s how to achieve a successful life. -Reality of a Preacher’s Daughter
We consume our lives with stress that’s not even our own. We can’t control everyone else’s lives and the decisions that they make. That is something I’ve taken responsibility for most of my life, other people’s lives. I felt that I could save the world, looking at families choices and saying that’s not a good idea. It’s difficult when you can see potential in the person and they do something else stupid… You want to cuss them out and say that was “dumb as hell”. I’ve had enough of that. I’m tired of giving advice and people do the opposite and want me to bail them out.
LEAVE ME ALONE
I have never had people concerned about my wellbeing. Are you ok? Do you need anything? You’re not feeling good, Let me bring you some soup. It’s always only been about everyone else. You will find out more in the book.
I’m editing my own book, so I can tell you right now, there will be grammatical errors, cussing, and a lot of things you wouldn’t think would be in a book called “Reality Of A Preacher’s Daughter”… but it is what it is. It’s my life and my life wasn’t sugar coated, so I’m not sugar coating what I write.
My book will be done before the summer. Flaws and all…
Just my thoughts
You ever been so concerned with details that you can’t get shit done. I’m not making excuses, but I don’t have any one to talk to, no one to give me business advice, no one pushing me to keep going, so this is all me. My way to converse is writing, whether I’m writing music or my book.
So my life… I feel like there’s always so much to do and I don’t know what to do first. My focus is my book, my art and my skincare. Overall, I need to get these bills paid. There is always a bill coming out right after they are paid. I’m pretty good with money, but unfortunately there were some setbacks. I read in most peoples success stories where they maxed out credit cards, cars repossessed, late on rent, eating the minimum… so I don’t feel sorry for myself. I just need to know where to go from here.
First Post of 2016
My family life has been a secret. A secret that’s made me cry, laugh, and at times even irate, but no one saw my emotions.
No one knew how hard it was to be me. No one knew why I was always so quite when I was little. No one knew I just wanted friends, someone to talk to. No one knew how horrible my relationship was with my dad and how I felt because of it.
Well… Soon everyone will know.
Been a while
I haven’t been on here in a while. This has been a year to remember with wonderful and horrible things that have happened.
I don’t have my book out yet, but my business has definitely blossomed in since I started releasing my past.
Let’s see where my life takes me
Inhuman
I couldn’t show emotions growing up. I just dealt with life. I couldn’t cry because I had to be strong for my siblings. I couldn’t laugh, because it only lasted a moment anyway. I couldn’t show anger because the person who I had anger towards wasn’t around. Strong. That’s what I had to be.
Now as a business owner, I have to go to work and show that I’m happy. That I’m having a marvelous day and I want everyone who comes to the store to feel this great energy even when I don’t have it. I have to turn off the emotions of my life, and smile.
But is that being inhuman? Did I grow up being inhuman because of what my life handed me? As a kid, other kids used to ask, “why do you walk like a robot? Loosen up!” I didn’t laugh at jokes. I rarely smiled. Smiling to me was a form of Vulnerability. I didn’t want to be vulnerable. That’s how people get their feelings hurt. #Emotionless #Robot
Reality Of A Preacher's Daughter 