I’ve got folk on my case about going to church. My thoughts are exactly what they are and they’re not changing any time soon. I use to be that “churchy” girl. That lasted 5 seconds because I realized it wasn’t me.
I just live. I feel like too many people put too much emphasis on the wrong things… like church. I was raised in the church and I’m not interested. -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter
When I was 13 I was more confident than I am now as an adult. Why is that?
Fear is real -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter
I’m not a charity. Don’t treat me as such. I’m an artist just like you. I’m a person just like you. I’m learning just like you.
So Natural Creativity and Talent… a lot of people get this fucked up. Just because you copied someone else’s work, does not mean you are talented… maybe just skilled at forgery, which makes you a “Fraud”. I’ll come back to this one day. I have plenty to say about this!
Back to what I was saying.
I just don’t think people understand proper communication. I doubt I have a problem with communication because I’m so calculated. I chose the right times to communicate since people get in their feelings so damn quick. I’m like “what the fuck us wrong with YOoUuu?” SMDH
Man… help me God -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter
The dark was my light. It kept me grounded and centered. The darkness quieted the noise of my chaotic life. I didn’t hear my parents fighting or my siblings screaming. The dark was my home. -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter
Like I’m tossing some shit in the trash can and miss, pick it up, miss, pick it up again, miss. SHIT!!! I feel like I’m aiming right but I’m going around, over, or coming short of the goal.
All I want to do is fucking throw it away.
Throw away all the fuckery that keeps me down, holds me back, makes me sick, breaks me out, makes me depressed, has me overwhelmed and stressed the fuck out. -RealityOfAPreachersDaughter
I’ve avoided writing about my life because the shits still hurts really bad and sometimes I’d rather not deal with all the strong emotions. Opinions like to fly around to discourage the book, but it is what it is. There comes a time where you have to step the fuck up no matter what happens and face your truth. No matter how dirty it is.
And everyone’s expression is different, so judge me if you want to. -ROAPD
“Imperfectly Perfect”
I’ve struggled over the years with Perfection. I couldn’t do it if it wasn’t planned out. I couldn’t show it if it had flaws. That’s why there are very few pics of me and even though I’ve been an artist for over 20 years, I never showed my work or considered myself an “artist”. I’ve never been good enough for myself. Only within the past 2 years have I been easing out of my shell I’ve been hiding in until I was “Perfect”.
I realized something when creating this lamp, because I wanted it “flawless”. No matter how hard you work at being perfect, you could never achieve Perfection in the way you think. You are perfect the way you are. That’s what makes us human and not robots.
The lamp has flaws and so do I, but we are still beautiful.
We are “Imperfectly Perfect”
December 2, 2016
Don’t want to make a decision because afraid that I’ll make the wrong one. But if I don’t make decisions I’ll end up like my father.
I admire my father’s commitment to one job for over 25 years, but to think that he lost the job and came out with nothing is sad.
My mother on the other hand rides with the wind. In my opinion, where the wind blows, she goes.
I like stability. Creating a foundation to be grounded on. Using my passion to make money. I don’t want to waste my life. I hate wasting time and money.
There is so much I want to do so I really hope these upcoming decisions change my life for the better. Either way, at least I’m moving forward. –Reality Of A Preacher’s Daughter
Diss- Bout in tears. I see family members, second cousins, posting pics of my grandfather, cousins, aunts and other family members I’ve never met. Unless you’ve experienced it, you wouldn’t know how it is to feel like an outcast of your own. Same blood running through my veins. The same history. I don’t get people interested in getting to know “the granddaughter” of the man whose first born came into this world a few months after he got married.
Funk- It’s not my fault. I didn’t have anything to do with that! I just want to know my family. NO, I wasn’t raised in privilege. NO, I didn’t graduate from college. NO, I haven’t travelled the world. I don’t have an extremely successful business yet. BUT, I’m making it on my own. And I will be great on my OWN, because I don’t have a choice. I bought my first car, never ask anyone for anything. No one around me has anything I need anyway.
Shun- My own mother doesn’t even follow my facebook. She can’t see anything I post, why is she even my friend on there. Why am I a problem? What is it about me that people run away from? I really don’t get it and I don’t want to do anymore crying. I’ve cried my damn eyes out since I started writing last year. (you will see why when you read my book).
I try not to care about what people think of me, but I can’t help it sometimes. This shit really hurts. I have the strangest feeling that when I make it, people will blow my phone up and try to break down my door to get to me then. It will be fake though. I’m a genuine person and that won’t be. I may cater to it for a little while to see what it feels like being loved, appreciated and wanted.
I’ve been DISSed because of a FUNK that I didn’t have anything to do with… Now I’m completely shunned. DAMMNIT WHY??? What if you were in my shoes? How would you want to be treated. Even the woman I’ve lived for, supported, trusted, followed, respected, Loved unconditionally, and worked so hard to make something of myself to buy her whatever she wanted is avoiding me.
I must be some type of fucked up person to deserve this shit. I will never treat anyone like this. I vow to be MYSELF to Change the World. Someone wants me. I guess I just haven’t met them yet. I’m proud of myself. I’m a pretty strong ass person not to have given up already. I just keep pulling myself right along until my change comes, because its coming.
Reality Of A Preacher's Daughter 